Black Rebel Motorcycle Club is one of my favorite bands. I saw them play at the 9:30 Club in Washington D.C. a few years ago and they blew my mind. They rocked through an hour and a half set and than came out for a 40 minute encore. The set list spanned all of their albums and even featured a couple of acoustic songs in the middle. Easily one of the best live performances I have ever witnessed. They brought this "in your face" intensity to the stage and left me wanting more when I left that night. I went with my man Spock and it was a great all around experience. At one point the band acknowledged a sign some crazed fan had made in the crowd that read "BRMC makes my vagina weep tears of joy." We still joke about that to this day.
This song, "Ain't No Easy Way," is one of my favorites. Great tune. The chorus of the song goes "there ain't no easy way, no there ain't no easy way out." When I listen to this song today it makes me think about my past relationships and how there truly has been no easy way out of any of them. Is there an easy way to end a relationship? Certainly not if it was a serious relationship with any real feelings involved. Getting over a failed relationship can be quite the obstacle. I recently went through one of my own, and have helped a close friend go through one of his own.
The details are not important, but the end result was one that I am sure everyone can relate too. I was left with unanswered questions, feelings of resentment, sadness, and a sense of betrayal. Sound familiar? I struggled with trying to deal with all these emotions, and in true ultra masculine fashion, attempting to mask all my emotion from the outside world. Bottling everything up and hiding it away is something I used to do very well. One more skeleton hanging in the closet with all the others.
But in the end this is just self pitying bull-shit! And it doesn't really come down to getting over it, its more about letting go. Instead of clinging to those lost feelings of intimacy, companionship, love, friendship, whatever you want to fill this blank in with, there comes a point when you need to just let go and move on. Its not an easy step to make, and it takes a certain amount of mental and emotional toughness to take that step, but its essential in getting on with your life. The best tool I have found in dealing with this is having the ability to detach yourself from the situation and take an honest look at it in its entirety. No second guessing, excuses, denial, sugar coating, or any other self defeating thoughts. Put everything in its proper perspective, keep yourself honest, and just let it go.
The woman that left me did me a favor. In the end all she was doing was holding me back, and helping to enable the immature and irresponsible Mike to run wild. I have experienced a lot of growth over the past six months, more so than in the past ten years of my life, and there was no room for her anymore in my life. It was a tough time getting over it, I'm not gonna lie. I had a rough few months, but part of my problem was in that very mindset. Because for me, its not about getting over it, its about letting go.
Now I shall leave you all with another badass BRMC song. Enjoy.
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